This is the real life account of a food mix-up saga that unfolded in our office and all the dorime that came with it.
It happened on Monday morning. Mike, rushing to avoid getting to the office late, quickly grabbed the black nylon containing his food and took off without checking what was packaged for him. Can somebody play Dorime track 1?
On arriving at the office, Mike proceeded to the cafeteria and dropped his food, so eager to start the day’s work that he still didn’t check to see what had been packaged in the black nylon. DJ please play Dorime track 2
As the day went by, Francis, the office assistant, went out to buy lunch for some colleagues. Mike later goes for lunch, picks up his food, finally checks it, sees one boiled egg. He thought it strange because he knew there was chicken at home but was just too hungry to care. He started eating and was almost done when…
Shayo, his colleague, walks in and starts looking for his food with Francis the office assistant. Mike didn’t pay too much attention until he heard “there was a boiled egg in the food.” The description of the food was so apt that it became obvious that Mike don chop person food o…
Upon investigation, Mike’s real food was found having chicken, fish and snail as protein. What sort of sorcery is this? Mike wondered!
Luckily for Mike, Shayo didn’t make a big deal out of it as it was the close of his shift. That’s how Iyanu, another colleague who was in the right place at the right time, ate free food!
One of the hottest, most talked-about events in the Nigerian social circles right now has been Obi Cubana’s mum’s burial and nothing seems to be enough to kill Obi Cubana’s shine.
From the over 400 cows donated to the host, the $100,000 diamond pendant, 67 private jets that landed Oba to the fleet of over 500 luxury cars, the ceremony was as loud as loud can be. We followed this story closely and here are five lessons we gathered from it.
1. Nigerians can joke about anything.
Like, I’m not even sure we take even ourselves seriously anymore. This has to be the height. Somebody’s mother died and people were everywhere on social media saying “God when?” Seriously guys???
2. Invest in your social capital.
They said connect with people, you say no, you’re an introvert, you like your personal space, etc. Being rich in people is a thing, your network is your net-worth. If the sheer amount of cows donated and money sprayed/flung doesn’t change your mind, what will?
3. Make your own soap.
As usual, the whole saga had people saying “cut soap for us” and the likes. In an interview with bbc pidgin, Obi Cubana was asked to cut soap for Nigerians and he responded “dem no dey cut soap for anybody for dis world.” In other words, people, make your own soap o.
4. Work hard consistently.
Since soap cutting is out of it, working hard consistently is the next best thing out there then. Being excellent at what you do will not be enough, you will have to also be consistent with it. Hustle o, make your girlfriend no leave you go party for oba.
5. Nigerian scammers are creative.
All was well and good after the burial ceremony, until I got a dm from Obi Cubana asking for an airtel recharge to help make money fly in my household. Like, what???
Nothing probably underlines the peculiarity of the times we are in other than the fact that we are about to experience the Euro 2020 in 2021.
It’s been a year where ‘normal’ was redefined, and the only thing that would probably have been more shocking would be Arsenal winning the Champions League…
Well, here’s a cool fact for you, you can watch the Euro 2020 showing from 11 June – 11 July on Startimes across its five Sports Channels in HD picture format.
To catch all the action starting tomorrow live via ST World Football HD, Sports Premium, ST Sports Focus, ST Sports Arena and ST Sports Life, renew your TV subscription and pay your electricity bills to keep the lights on.
Recently, the Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN) banned Nigerian banks from dealing in all forms of cryptocurrencies; including bitcoin.
Why was Bitcoin banned?
The Central Bank of Nigeria cited ‘use of digital currency for laundering and terrorism‘ as the chief reason for banning cryptocurrencies. This comes shortly after several bulls run in the price of bitcoin, gaining over 300% price increase from 2020.
Starting earlier on the month of February 2021, Nigerian banks and other financial institutions were authorized by CBN to cease crypto transactions or face a penalty.
Away from the financial powerhouses, experts have analyzed how bitcoin ban in Nigeria would impact local traders.
The Nigerian cryptocurrency market
Looking back at statistics, Quartz Nigeria placed Nigeria as the second-largest bitcoin market in the world after the United States. Stears Businessreported in February 2021 that over $200 million worth of crypto is traded from Nigeria monthly. That’s a huge market to consider!
The bitcoin ban in Nigeria simply means that it would be difficult to directly convert the Naira to bitcoin, or trade bitcoin for items.
However, it does not stop at that.
The CBN regulation immediately affected many fintech establishments in Nigeria dealing with virtual accounts. Providus bank took a special hit, having to halt all virtual accounts following the order. VTpass had to temporarily deactivate all virtual accounts and recently reactivated all accounts with new virtual account numbers.
Conversations following the ban continue to float all over the internet. But what is the solution? What is the way forward for Nigerians looking to continue crypto trading amidst the ban?
Here’s our researched take:
Consider Peer-to-Peer Trading: Pending when the ban would be lifted, the most viable solution to buy crypto at the moment would be P2P trading. This is buying privately from a trusted source (a friend, a local agency, etc.) as trading involving bank transfers would be impossible.
Create a Domiciliary account: Well, since there are no restrictions on domiciliary accounts, you can open one, convert Naira and Dollars, and trade cryptos through that account.
Cryptocurrencies trading may have been banned in Nigeria, that doesn’t mean the digital currencies are done for. The future of cryptos for the African market remains bright against all odds.
Another valentine is just around the corner and as usual, couples feel that knowing pressure of making it extra-special. Something about trying to out-do the previous year’s valentine keeps couples from truly doing what really matters.
But valentine doesn’t have to be a Big-Bang, dazzling event that drains the bank account. While spoiling each other with expensive gifts and treats are still fanciful, spending quality time is all that counts.
And no, we are not talking about the cliché restaurant outings alone; here are7 unique valentine activities you can try this year:
1. Give each other a massage
You know that feeling of lying in bed and having some strong or soft fingers work out the knots in your shoulders and feet? Yeah! Why not relinquish that this valentine?
When you and your partner at that level of your relationship, bathing together might not sound unique. But here is something to spice things up.
Place candles or spotlights at attractive places around the bathtub, get a bowl of strawberries, a tray of chocolate, and a chilled bottle of champaign; all at arms’ length. Have a long, hot, tub bath together, while munching on sweets and champaign.
3. Have a romantic movie marathon
We gave an example of a movie marathon in a previous post. Since this year’s valentine falls on a Sunday, it makes for a great escape from reality and into the entertainment of tons of movies.
Be sure to have popcorn, drinks, and each other during this marathon; and make time for desserts and in-house lunch or dinner between movies.
4. Play a game together
When was the last time you two played a game just for two? It might be something classic as a Ludo or Whot, or something deeper like a Truth or Dare game.
If both of you are outdoor champs, this might be the perfect day to race each other to a stadium, play snooker, table tennis, or go swimming.
5. Try a new kitchen special
Cooking together is always perfect for Valentine. However, instead of making what you already know, why not try something new and special for both of you?
The internet is overflowing with exciting dishes for valentine from every part of the world. Set today to try that special Thai cuisine or French salad; as far as the ingredients are within reach.
6. Drive around town
You don’t have to have a destination in mind. Just gas up the car, hop in and drive! If you are in Lagos, check out places to visit.
There is that fun of plying roads you both have never plied before, getting lost in a city and finding your way back. Yeah!
Good thing is, you can always crash into a new restaurant or park to eat or catch fun, then zoom off again. Luckily, Google Map now makes drive-around safe and superfun.
7. Work together on a new craft or art
Creative couples with busy-hands may want to create something together this day; whatever it is. From making a photo-scrapbook to splash painting, sketching each other, or even making a toy.
Anything at all.
Poetry is yet another art. Have you ever wondered what you’d write your partner if given a pen and 24 hours of thinking? Why not game each other with this one and have each person submit their poem to the other, at the end of the day.
Valentine is always a great day for couples to embrace the company of each other, especially with uninterrupted services.
BIG news making headlines on top English sports papers is; Frank Lampard sacked by Chelsea.
The Chelsea legend that took over managerial duties at the club in 2019 has been relieved of his duties just after 18 months.
In a statement following the sack, Chelsea said, “results and performances have not met the club’s expectations, leaving the club mid-table without any clear path to sustained improvement”.
After enjoying a successful spell in his first season as manager, Lampard’s Chelsea has underperformed this season. They sit 9th on the EPL table following 5 defeat out of their last 8 matches.
Lampard, who remains Chelsea’s all-time highest goalscorer led the London club to FA Cup glory in his first season as well as securing them a Champions League spot.
Expectation rose high this season after Chelsea spent over $292 million on signings the likes of Timo Werner, Kai Havertz, Ben Chilwell, Hakim Ziyech, and Édouard Mendy; but the big names signings have been unable to link well on the pitch.
Who’s next in for the Hot Seat?
Chelsea is known to fire managers in split-seconds show of underperformance. The BIG question after Frank Lampard’s sack remains, “who’s next in line to take the hot seat at the Blues?”
Rumors have it that formal PSG and Borussia Dortmund coach Thomas Tuchel is the only candidate on Chelsea’s list to take over from Lampard. While the German is yet to be contacted hours after the sack, papers report that his appointment is a strong possibility.
Discussions are all over the internet regarding the sack. Some fans had called for Chelsea to be patient and give managers time to build teams. Others seem to agree with the sack and Chelsea’s underperformance under Lampard.
What do you think? Has Chelsea been unfair to a legend in his right, and an all-time goalscorer for this club? Has Lampard truly shown his lack of top football managerial experience?
Well, it’s exciting times for MultiChoice customers – starting January 14th to March 31st, 2021. That’s because MultiChoice is back with the hugely popular MultiChoice Step Up campaign!
The MultiChoice Step Up Campaign gives all active and disconnected DStv Compact, Confam, and Yanga customers the opportunity to pay for a package a step above their current package and get a boost to view the next higher package.
That means that if a ‘Yanya’ customer subscribes for ‘Confam’, the next package; the customer would automatically be boosted to view ‘Compact’, the bouquet one-step above ‘Confam’.
In the same vein, ‘Confam’ customers would view ‘Compact Plus’ if they pay for ‘Compact’. ‘Compact’ customers would view ‘Premium’ if they pay for ‘Compact Plus’.
Here’s a table explaining this promo better:
Your current subscription
What you get
How much you SAVE
N4,615 for DStv Confam
DStv Compact worth N7,700
N7,900 for DStv Compact
Compact Plus worth N12,400
N12,400 for Compact Plus
DStv Premium worth N18,400
That’s right, you SAVE up to N6000 on this promo to view your favourite DStv channels on DStv Premium.
“Ok, so what of we that use GOtv?” You may ask. Not to worry, GOtv users are not left out. For just N2,999, GOtv Jolli and Jinga customers can step up to GOtv Max worth N3,600!
On Tuesday 29th October, and Wednesday 21st October, the first leg of the 2020/2021 UEFA Champions League season playoff. We witnessed the return of Europe’s most thrilling football competition and the art of top soccer athletes.
The group stages of the tournament began with surprises and might just end with some more. In this article, we go over some of the unexpected match results from the UEFA champions league 2020/21 opener and matches to watch out for in the group stage:
Paris Saint Germain vs. Manchester United
Perhaps the only surprise from this encounter was the fact that PSG could still lose to Manchester United after their performance last season. The men from Paris made it to the finals last season but fell behind to Bayern Munich in a 1-0 contest.
Two seasons ago, Manchester United beat PSG 1-3 at the Parc des Princes stadium; everyone thought the Parisians would make a statement in this match with a win. But they fell behind 2 goals to 1 to the Reds.
Chelsea vs. Sevilla
Ok, not much surprise, but here is a match where a 300 million Euro Chelsea squad faces a firepower Sevilla and it ended 0-0. Fans were left a bit disappointed and so are we.
Real Madrid vs. Shakhtar Donetsk
Real lost 0-1 to newly-promoted Cadiz last week in La Liga Santander; so it came more like a shock when Shakhtar put them 2-3 to the sword again at home.
Fans all over social media brought Real Madrid’s manager Zinedine Zidane under fire. But we feel the manager can only do much. With these results, Real Madrid needs a total squad rethink.
Pretty much every other game produced expected or near results, especially Bayern Munich who pounded Athletico Madrid 4-0 as a warning of their intent to retain the European Champions crown.
Now, let’s see the top group matches that you can’t afford to miss:
Barcelona vs Juventus: The long-awaited Messi vs. Ronaldo meeting after 3 years since Christiano Ronaldo left La Liga would finally happen. Twice!
Athletico Madrid vs Bayern Munich: The Germans already drew first blood with their 4-0 victory over their Spanish rival. But all roads lead to the Wanda Metropolitano for the return leg.
Manchester United vs PSG: Neymar and Mbappe have still got a chance to prove to Europe that Manchester United is not superior to the entire French football.
Sevilla vs Chelsea: The return leg of this encounter would hold at Seville and we can’t wait to see it! Perhaps, this is one of the most anticipated encounters after Barcelona vs Juventus.
Real Madrid vs Inter Millan: These two giants would meet in the third week of the tournament. A big one. We would get to finally see Zidane take on Conte in a European competition.
To catch all these actions live on your television, subscribe your GOtv or DStv with VTpass, either on the web or mobile app. We’ve got you covered!
New seasons of the English Premier League (EPL), Spanish La Liga, German Bundesliga, Italian Seria A and French Ligue un are back.
Just last week, Crystal Palace knocked Manchester United 3-1 at Old Trafford, bringing back the ‘anything can happen’ tingles of the premier league.
In Germany, current UEFA champions and Bundesliga winner, Bayern Munich kickstarted their new season with an 8-0 slaughter of Schalke. Jeez!
Christiano Ronaldo pulled in a late one on the 88th minute as Juventus cruised 3-0 over Sampdoria in Seria A season opener. Guess the race for who’s best between him and his long time rival, Lionel Messi has just begun.
Speaking of Messi; he is yet to record a goal this season as FC Barcelona is just concluding pre-season ahead of 2020-21 La Liga.
Something to look out for, right? Or perhaps, we should look with awe into Ligue Un where Paris Saint Germain sits 8th on the league table haven lost two early matches. Hmmm. . .
With so much cooking up in Europe’s top 5 leagues, here are 5 things to look out for as the 2020-21 season unfolds:
The over-broadcasted news about Messi leaving FC Barcelona would most likely be felt all season long. Every move made by the Argentine would surely be scrutinized in the light of this.
Although reports state that Messi is willing to play one more season with Barcelona, all eyes are on him. Would he punish Barca for refusing to let him go or would he deliver yet another stunning result this season?
Bayern for another UEFA title?
Following a strong year for Bayern Munich last season, experts are predicting the German against might bag themselves yet another UEFA Champions League title; that is if they continue playing as they are currently.
The early 8-0 trashing of strong rivals, Schalke last week already shows Bayern’s intent. And with a solid squad of young talents, an ambitious coach and passionate fans, those predictions might just come true.
Liverpool on the hot seat
Current EPL champions are starting the season in a position all previous EPL winners do find themselves; – defending the title. Jurgen Klopp managed to pull a stunt for the reds last season by winning the title for Liverpool’s after a 30-years old title draught.
Now, he finds himself defending the title against strong contenders; the likes of Manchester City, Manchester United and Chelsea; a team that just spent $300 million on boosting their squad.
Another UEFA, Another Barca, Another Drama?
Barcelona has become the object of mockery in UEFA Champions League following 4 consecutive humiliating exists. The latter being an 8-2 trashing at the hands of Bayern Munich.
The club has shown spirit, however, in starting a new sporting project; signing new talents, urging old legs out, bringing in a more fitting manager, shifting some powers is management, etc; but fans around the world would never forget Barca’s UEFA Champions League woes.
Another UEFA, another Barca!
New Phase for Juventus?
When Christiano Ronaldo joined Juventus, it was solely to help them win the UEFA Champions League. 3 years down the lane, that is yet to happen.
Juventus had to sack Maurizio Sarri following a disappointing season in 2019-20 UEFA and appointed Andrea Pirlo as new manager. Is this the new face to lead Juventus into European glory once again?
To catch all of the footballing action this season, simply subscribe your GOtv, DStv or StarTimes. Non-stop entertainment waiting for you! Renew TV subscription with VTpass.